This Essay is based on an interview with the incredible Dan Doty
"When you help unlock, liberate and declutter our human reality, you can drive abnormally positive results.”
-Dan Doty
As part of my own development journey, I have sat in over a hundred men's groups, sharing hopes, fears, anxieties, and joys. My good friend, Dan Doty, expert in men’s work and corporate consultant to leaders of all genders, has been the architect of many of those.
In my coaching work, I often weave threads of personal development into my support of my clients. I balance business consulting with personal and team development approaches in all that I do. I see my client’s human connections as critical to their success, as much as the quality of the GTM strategy.
To this day, I credit the work I've done with Dan Doty as a key ingredient in the way I approach my consulting and coaching work. Here are two lessons I'd like to share from my conversation with Dan.
Vulnerabilty is Key: Dan came to executive coaching by way of deep heart centered men's work - often in the great outdoors. He found his heart-centered approach had a huge impact. He lacked a traditional corporate lens, so he didn't fall into the trap of many coaches, who come with preordained approaches and frames that keep the dialogue in a cerebral realm. He experienced clients as vulnerable, open to engage from their heart, and able to create 'big' change. A key insight in my work is that vulnerability is the pathway to the underlying source of our self-limitations as leaders. My experience has taught me that humans make meaningful change by being vulnerable - to serve my clients well, I have to be vulnerable and be a safe place for their vulnerability.
Its Hearts AND Minds: Whether I am working with an individual executive, mediating between two, or working with a team, I work on two levels simultaneously - feeling and thinking. The ability to solve complex problems goes up exponentially when our emotional state is clear and grounded. To quote Dan, "when you help unlock, liberate and declutter our human reality, you can drive abnormally positive results." However, opening hearts and getting vulnerable, alone, doesn't move the business. You need both an open heart and an engaged mind. I've seen the power of helping teams on both levels. I've helped teams step into an open hearted state, from which they were able to resolve issues plaguing them for years... in a matter of hours. Why? Because they could address the issues, as they are, vs. obfuscating them with passive agressive expressions of withheld resentments and righteousness.
Whether in coaching a leader or helping their team navigate high stakes decisions, these lessons deeply inform my approach. If you'd like to talk, reach out.
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